I learned from my cat
Life is hard, then you nap.
One day ignore people, the next day annoy them.
When in doubt cop an attitude.
Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.
Climb your way to the top, that's why the drapes are there.
Never sleep alone when you can sleep on someone's face.
If you're not receiving enough attention,
try knocking over several expensive lamps.
Make your mark in the world or at least spray each corner.
When you go out into the world, remember:
being placed on a pedestal is a right, not a privilege.

Author Unknown